Am I to young?

[olgac]

Excellent advice, Bill! I especially agree with cutting carbs and hitting the gym! And the money of course
Women all over the world love desirable men!
I think this is even more true right now that the standard of living for young people really went down
compared to our generation! Pretty much any guy with a good job who isn't ugly will attract lots of
good looking local women!

After a man is in his 40s already it gets much more complicated as after this age I think about half of the local women are obese! So that might be a time to go look abroad, unless a man too is obese then get in shape first!

[ML]

After a man is in his 40s already it gets much more complicated as after this age I think about half of the local women are obese! So that might be a time to go look abroad, unless a man too is obese then get in shape first!

Very true and big part of the reason I searched in FSU.
The other part is I needed a much younger woman than I could achieve in USA for sex.
Many women lose interest in sex after age 50 or so . . . but I know that some women do not lose interest.  What percentage is in each camp, I do not know.

[ML]

For humor:

Intelligence is the first thing I look for in a woman.

Because if she doesn’t have any, I may just have a chance.

[Trenchcoat]

I am interested in FSU girls. The reasons?
They seem more mature then swdish girls, they usually attract me more then blonde swedish girls. And I also love the russian language and the accents it gives on other languages.

But I am "only" 22 years old, am I to young to find a girl?
Alot of the girls you see on the sites are 18-23 years old. But they are looking for 30+ guys :S
Shall I wait until I am 30 or is it okay for me to date girls in FSU?

I think I can attract ladies because I am healthy, hard working and a nice man that is romantic. And the people I have met in Belarus has also said that they consider me to be a good man because I am th person I am.

What do you say guys, am I to young?

I'm guessing now you will be about 40 if you are still going and still interested in a FSW so you'll now be in the older age group they would seek.

If you are still interested in meeting a FSW then I would usually aim for those in their late twenties or older. While almost anything is possible the late teens up to early to mid twenties is where the dating market is usually highly active, FSU or otherwise. So unless you find a really particular girl in that age range the vibrancy of the dating market along with other factors means it's often not a good place to fish for a guy wanting a stable relationship.

For a guy that is 22, if I were 22 again and have my time over I would set out to go to a University in my FSU country of choice. I kind of always regret not being more adventurous at that age and pushing the boat out that far and doing the same as others my age and going to a University in my home country, but then the FSU was all alien to me and seemed far away.

I think in such a place a young foreign guy would be able to pick up easy but dating situations in different countries can vary so be careful of where you choose and how people date there. Other than that I think as a young guy of 22 just going to a FSU country for a holiday can be the way to go. I personally think at that age you can score better in person than on dating sites as younger women out there are more likely to relate to another younger person (guy) in person than they are an older guy. In other words your dating pool is likely to be much bigger as a younger person being among other younger persons in person than on international dating sites that attract fewer women that are willing to date older men.

Local women in home country I would generally say if it's not working for you  then don't try to make it work. It's life trying to tell you that you're not in the right location that will naturally do well for you. If you try to improve yourself what will happen if you ever fall down as a man in whatever way even if you can't help it? Recession, Sudden Bad Health, Accident, Get fed up of the Gym, etc, etc... In my opinion you want a girl who is more naturally into you without you having to raise your game too much, you can raise it later to keep her content if you like, but otherwise in my opinion you run the risk of picking up a girl who isn't that naturally into you and long term that probably isn't going to play out well.

[olgac]

I disagree. Yes things can happen in the future: men get sick, lose jobs, gain weight etc.
During the period of initial attraction and flirting Your physique and how successful You are are still
the main attraction points for any woman. What attracts a woman initially is not what will keep her with
a man 10 years into a relationship.

You are saying a woman is supposed to be "into you" just out of thin air?
I am saying in order to even fall in love with You something has to attract her to You in the first place
only then deeper feelings can develop.

So definitely up Your game, be fit, financially stable etc to be attractive to many more women
and then among them there will be the one really into You.

Otherwise You aren't much better than a frumpy overweight woman who thinks a guy who will really love
her is the guy who will fall in love with her just the way she is so no reason to try to look attractive.

[Trenchcoat]

I disagree. Yes things can happen in the future: men get sick, lose jobs, gain weight etc.
During the period of initial attraction and flirting Your physique and how successful You are are still
the main attraction points for any woman. What attracts a woman initially is not what will keep her with
a man 10 years into a relationship.

You are saying a woman is supposed to be "into you" just out of thin air?
I am saying in order to even fall in love with You something has to attract her to You in the first place
only then deeper feelings can develop.

So definitely up Your game, be fit, financially stable etc to be attractive to many more women
and then among them there will be the one really into You.

Otherwise You aren't much better than a frumpy overweight woman who thinks a guy who will really love
her is the guy who will fall in love with her just the way she is so no reason to try to look attractive.

In saying the above I was generally talking about an everyday average guy, I should have really made that clear. Guys that are overweight, possibly short, badly dressed, too unkempt, smelly, too bad socially, or too skinny, ugly, etc - yes everything in that direction would need to improve to either get rid of those negatives or gain positives to offset them.

Generally I am saying that the everyday average guy is best of going and finding a girl wherever in the world who will be into him without having to be Mr muscles working out in the gym regularly, or a guy earning high income, or a real wealthy guy, etc. That can help find him a woman that is more truly into him and when the chips are down (if things go that way) she won't then find him a turn off and dump the guy for another one.

[2tallbill]

Generally I am saying that the everyday average guy is best of going and finding a girl wherever in the
world who will be into him without having to be Mr muscles working out in the gym regularly, or a guy
earning high income, or a real wealthy guy, etc. That can help find him a woman that is more truly into
him and when the chips are down (if things go that way) she won't then find him a turn off and dump
the guy for another one.

Do you have any evidence to support your claim? You make an argument supporting mediocrity. My
argument is to get your life in order so that you can achieve more.

[ML]

I disagree. Yes things can happen in the future: men get sick, lose jobs, gain weight etc.
During the period of initial attraction and flirting Your physique and how successful You are are still
the main attraction points for any woman. What attracts a woman initially is not what will keep her with
a man 10 years into a relationship.

You are saying a woman is supposed to be "into you" just out of thin air?
I am saying in order to even fall in love with You something has to attract her to You in the first place
only then deeper feelings can develop.

So definitely up Your game, be fit, financially stable etc to be attractive to many more women
and then among them there will be the one really into You.

Otherwise You aren't much better than a frumpy overweight woman who thinks a guy who will really love
her is the guy who will fall in love with her just the way she is so no reason to try to look attractive.

Good analysis!

[Trenchcoat]

Do you have any evidence to support your claim? You make an argument supporting mediocrity. My
argument is to get your life in order so that you can achieve more.

Can I put myself forward as evidence? Here I am, I haven't changed significantly to interest the female dating market here - at least not where they would be rocking up to me, chatting me up, even asking me out. At least not girls that would interest me - single girls without another dudes baggage at least reasonable looking with at least decent enough character traits (not expecting a Saint) and reasonable enough personality.

I've bought a few new fashion brand clothes and a small amount of bling but probably not on the extensiveness that it makes a lot of difference, at least not here.

Body wise my physique has remained much the same and even when I was doing the gym stuff it didn't change quite enough to make enough difference.

Yet I meet up with an attractive enough looking girl from Ukraine and aside from some difficulties along the way we have now been going together one year now and seem ok enough now as far as I can tell.

Now I know that a 1 year relationship is not the biggest milestone ever achieved but compared with my success with local women it is meteoric.

If the girl I'm with found me wanting she would leave well within that time, and think of it, I'm not even at the peak of how I could be at the moment. So if I improve potentially that could mean less chance of discontentment from her in the future.

What Olga says about deeper feelings developing over time is probably no doubt true, though not all relationships may necessarily develop those deeper feelings. Sometimes when a man fails in life or slides backwards the woman can be the first one to ditch him, some do, some don't. A lot of the time though it's the very pretty girls who men try to gain through upping their game who will ditch him if he backslides or starts to fail in life.

[krimster2]

ALL Russian/Ukrainian women spend a ton of effort on making themselves look attractive
why?
cuz of the competition - single wimmin poach husbands there ALL THE TIME
why? cuz most of the the single guys aren't datable, they're TOO POOR!! so grab somebody else's "provider" by wiggling yur jhoppa
what equivalent thing do you do to be more competitive?

why NOT write a book on procrastination when ya get around to it

yur biggest mistake was not leaving HOME and try to make yur way in the world, Trench me lad...
cuz ya woulda learned "the road" by travelin on it, and gone somewhere me boy-o
insteada being stuck in yo village mate

now we're gonna enter a period of chaos
thanks to all the FREAKIN RED NECKS WHO VOTED FOR TRUMP!!!!!

no poorty tang for ANY of you, Elon Musk took it all out yur budget, yur broke now
but he isn't, nor is Trump or Putin
here's a cup to hold yur pencils in when ya sell 'em on the street corner

gee, I hope this comment doens't make rednecks mad...oh dear....

[2tallbill]

Can I put myself forward as evidence? Here I am, I haven't changed significantly to interest the female dating market here - at least not where they would be rocking up to me, chatting me up, even asking me out. At least not girls that would interest me - single girls without another dudes baggage at least reasonable looking with at least decent enough character traits (not expecting a Saint) and reasonable enough personality.

No, you are not even remotely successful in having a wife, family, children or any other
evidence that you will some day have any of those things. You are the poster boy for what
will happen if you don't follow my advice. You are the man who didn't improve anything in
his life.

I hope that you find love and happiness, but you are no closer to achieving that then you
were ten years ago when you first arrived at the forum. Every day that you equivocate makes
it even less likely to ever succeed.

I could point to you as evidence to reinforce my argument. You are a man example of a
an aging woman complaining that she doesn't get what she wants, a hot, tall, rich guy
with muscles, loyalty, and an interesting personality.   

Telling young guy to get himself in order makes total sense. Laziness is a personality
trait. Women don't flock to men who do not want to improve their lot in life.

[Trenchcoat]

No, you are not even remotely successful in having a wife, family, children or any other
evidence that you will some day have any of those things. You are the poster boy for what
will happen if you don't follow my advice. You are the man who didn't improve anything in
his life.

I hope that you find love and happiness, but you are no closer to achieving that then you
were ten years ago when you first arrived at the forum. Every day that you equivocate makes
it even less likely to ever succeed.

I could point to you as evidence to reinforce my argument. You are a man example of a
an aging woman complaining that she doesn't get what she wants, a hot, tall, rich guy
with muscles, loyalty, and an interesting personality.   

Telling young guy to get himself in order makes total sense. Laziness is a personality
trait. Women don't flock to men who do not want to improve their lot in life.

I have a long term Ukrainian girlfriend now.

You base everything on a guy getting as much/as good as he can to getting as an attractive looking girl as he can dynamic (or similar). Life, dating and relationships are not that one dimensional. Many talking about dating on the internet, you tube, etc and the same mistake. Many Women are far from perfect and know they have shortcomings and are willing to accept a guy who is likewise but a good relationship can still be had.

[krimster2]

so Trench me lad, what happens to all the Ukrainian refugees in the UK if the war ends in a few months?
do they gotta go back?

if this happens, would ya marry her, so she can stay?/

[2tallbill]

I have a long term Ukrainian girlfriend now.

You base everything on a guy getting as much/as good as he can to getting as an attractive looking girl as he can dynamic (or similar). Life, dating and relationships are not that one dimensional. Many talking about dating on the internet, you tube, etc and the same mistake. Many Women are far from perfect and know they have shortcomings and are willing to accept a guy who is likewise but a good relationship can still be had.

 
Someday, that girl is going to want to have baby or babies. That's when she will start using the nest part
of her brain that every woman has, the part that looks into the future. The pragmatic part of a woman's
brain kicks into gear when the baby timer goes off.

In the UK some men are self-starter, highly proactive, self motivated types. There are also types that
have little ambition and/or they are such procrastinators that they will never realize whatever dreams
that they might have aspired to. A young girl will usually look at her immediate wants and needs first,
only then will she begin to look into the future.

Then you should ask yourself, are you Mr. Future or Mr. Right now.

I know guys who were Mr. Right now at one time but they ended up not being Mr. Future. If you want
to be Mr. Future you should really act like it so that some day you aren't Mr. Heartbroken, blame the
world for your losing the love of your life guy.

Get your act together, put together a plan with first steps, second steps etc. Every step needs to have
a date. Planning some day to finish a remodel soon, doesn't really work does it? If you can learn one
thing from your never ending remodeling project is that everything needs a schedule and a timeline.

I want you to be successful, happy and to have love a family and everything else. It is very possible
to fritter away the opportunity to be Mr. Future with Miss Pragmatic. 

Udachi!

Bill